How To Make New Friends

Do you know that good friends are good for you and bad friends are bad for you? Knowing this will guide you when you want to make new friends. For those who love to live life ‘solo’, don’t believe the lie that says you don’t need friends. Even the Creator of the world has friends: God, the Son and God, the Holy Spirit. The Trinity came together to create man in Genesis 1: 26. Also, God said in Genesis 2:18 that it’s not good for man to be alone. Therefore, the concept of friendship is not forbidden by God. If it were, Jesus wouldn’t need the twelve disciples by his side.

You cannot do life alone.  It’s important to have good friends around who will inspire, encourage and lift you. Good friendships give you a sense of belonging and purpose. Daniel and his friends are good examples of how friendship helps one thrive in difficult times. The lives of Daniel and his friends were under a threat because the king had a dream and couldn’t remember it. When the four friends gathered to pray, God revealed the king’s dream to Daniel, and the lives of Daniel, his friends and other people were spared. (Daniel 1:1-19). This is how powerful the synergy of good friends can be.

If you want to learn how to make new and good friends, the following tips will help you.

1. Smile: There is a quote by Luis Armstrong that says, “When you smile, the whole world smiles with you.” People want to be around positive people. This is why you prefer your fun aunty to your cranky aunt who always complains about what you do. To make friends, you cannot always be moody. Exude the kind of atmosphere and energy you want to see in your friends. Be a joyful and pleasant person to be around. When you smile often, your brain releases the serotonin enzyme which makes you feel better about yourself and makes you willing to reach out to others.
2. Give genuine compliments: Compliments are great ways to make friends because they lift the mood of others. Giving genuine compliments show that you are deeply concerned about others, and when you do this, you open the door of friendship. You can say to someone, “That shirt really looks good on you. Where did you get it from?” This is a great conversation starter, and soon enough, you would have gained a friend. To reiterate what I said earlier, make sure your compliments are genuine. Don’t deceive people with flatteries or false compliments in order to be their friend. We all have a way of knowing when someone is being honest with us. Also, avoid provocative and suggestive compliments. Compliment what people wear, what they say and their notable qualities. If you think someone was brave, tell him/her. It will help you make friends.
3. Call people by their names and try not to forget it. Psychology says that your brain has the ability to remember people’s names but a lack of motivation makes you forget these names. You can remember people’s names when you are genuinely interested in them. You might forget it the second time you call them but make sure you don’t forget people’s names the third time. It’s disrespectful when you call someone by another name – it shows that you were probably not listening to them and you only wanted to have a conversation with them to feel good. It is, therefore, important to call people by their names and try not to forget it. Also, calling people by their names shows respect, acknowledgment and admiration. Research also shows that calling someone by their name is an effective way of starting a conversation because it grabs the attention of the person on the other end of the conversation.
4. Start a conversation. Don’t end at greetings and introductions if you want to be friends with someone. Take the conversation to another level by asking them questions. You can use their body language as tips to start a conversation. For example, if someone looked angry or sad after a class, you can go ahead and start a conversation about whether they enjoyed the class or not. If they give an absent-minded nod, you can go ahead to give your thoughts and opinions about it so that they can trust you enough to open up about their opinions as well.
5. Offer to walk with someone: If after closing hours from school, someone is going in your direction, you can offer to walk the person home. Walking them home will allow you have fun conversations with them and they will definitely look forward to another walk with you in future. However, if your offer is declined, don’t take offense. They have their reasons for refusing your offer. Also, don’t allow one person’s rejection keep you from asking another person.
6. Be involved in fun activities in school. A great way to make new friends is to join registered clubs and societies in school. When you join a club of your interest, make sure you participate in the activities there. If you are good at soccer, join the football team and make sure you participate. In the process of participation, you will be paired with people and if such people have similar values as you, you can make them your new friends.
7. Pray to God to bring the right people your way. This is the most important step of all. Since you cannot afford to be unequally yoked with unbelievers, you need God to direct you to people who will help you; and not those who will destroy you. Having no friend is better than having the wrong friends. It is God who brings the right people our way; and when we ask Him for good friends, He sends them to us.

Friendships are significant and when you are bold enough to make good ones, they can sustain you through your journey in life.